I'm not going to speak my heart; I've done that.
I will not hurt you; I have already tried.
I will not apologize.. I have done that also..
I won't be writing you again
So neither will I invent, lie, confess, describe or explain.
So neither will I invent, lie, confess, describe or explain.
I won't even think, if I can just tell you this once
If you will read it
That I am crushing
(crushing, like a child)
on a memory
-- for now you are no more than one--
of someone with whom I already was
-- for now you are no more than one--
of someone with whom I already was
With whom I have had both tenderness & despair.
That I have known, touched, plied.
All of this I remember.
Though all the way through it having wanted you
always, as deeply and closely as I do so now, too.
I was so sure that we would meet again.. But it is plain to me now that the same thing doesn't happen more than once.
It can't -- that would be a fluke.
Just like beauty.
Happy birthday,
You November
You Vallejo.